Get Over Yourself Youngers

Women are impossible. I w-e-e-p for women’s ministers.

You’re probably thinking: 

Yeah, I’m not kidding. I weep for women’s ministers especially those on church staff. 

In addition to carrying the burden of ministering to the gender that makes up the MAJORITY of the church, with (usually) the smallest budget, and the least staff to church attendee ratio, they have to work with women of all generations, which means they get the gripes of the younger AND the older women. God help them. No literally, God, please help them.

You know what I hear most often from whiny youngers about their spiritual life? They want a mentor.

Hey Younger, listen up. Stop Snap Chatting for a moment. Lock your eyes with mine and try to act like a human, not a selfie-producing-robot. Guess where you can find a mentor? Just guess.

First, let’s review your wish list for a viable mentor. You want a female mentor that is/has:

  • older than you
  • Godly
  • wise
  • time to invest in your life
  • the ability to pray and encourage you

Hmmm. If only I could think of a place:

  • near your home
  • that is familiar to you
  • a place you attend weekly for worship
  • that hosted events for your gender
  • and attracted older, godly, wise women with time to invest in someone else’s life because they long to pray and encourage someone. 

Wonder WHERE we could find the mentor you so desire? Oh wait. That’s right. A whole stinking bunch of them are just a women’s-ministry-event away at your local church. 

Despite the millennial haters out there, I know millennials to be crazy relentless and awesome. The amount of clubs, groups, and YP events you attend is breaking Google Cal. Your choices in almost every other area of your life demand intentionality. You're crushing it, millennials, and I salute you. I'm your mega fan. Let's change the world together, mmmkay?

But you say the one thing, the most biggest, like biggest thing, you’ve like ever really wanted ever, in the whole world, ever (sniff sniff, ugly tear, tight throat) is that you like really want to find a mentor. 

Stop saying that. They are found. You’ve simply chosen not to go where they are.

So what… you don’t like the themed women’s ministry events at your church. Get over yourself. Do you ever attend things you do not enjoy to meet a new love interest, build your resume, or to help your kids? Of course you do. It’s called adulting. I see all your tinder adventures. Tell me you're not attending wacko events to meet the right someone. 

The mentor you want is within reach. So no more complaining about how desperate you are to find a mentor. Go to the next women’s event and start introducing yourself to mature women. Creep on them on Facebook during the teaching time. And before you leave the event ask your women’s minister or text her for a little direction to see if the woman you are creeping on is legit and then take the initiative and start a new relationship. 

And let me propose these questions:

  •  How hard would you creep on LinkedIn to make a new business contact or secure a new job? I bet if you compare that effort to the effort YOU have put into finding a mentor you would no longer be looking. 
  • What length will you go to help your kids make friends? What play date, school group or club will you join just to connect your kids? I bet if you compare that effort to the effort YOU have put into finding a mentor you would no longer be looking. 

Walk into an event at your church for women and get over the fact that you don’t want to be there and secure a mentor. And before you leave, give the women's minister a hug.